Mental Health Matters: The Importance of Healing

*Trigger Warning: Suicide

What is it about this place,

Beautiful masquerade

Dancing to destruction

Turning both cheeks and blind eyes,

What is it about this place,

Haunting us to leave it,

Or is it us,

And what we have created,

What is it about this place that makes us leave it so soon?

I wrote this in May of 2022 when I heard about two of my former high school classmates completing suicide within a few months apart. At the time of hearing this devastating news, I thought "I am so glad I moved away from Nebraska and landed in a place (Texas) where I can grow and have community." But that didn't solve my challenges with my mental health. Then more heartbreak, a well known and loved community member went through the same tragedy. That's when it hit the pit of my stomach, it was near and something I really needed to address, because new things were not the solution.

During this journey, I have been called to be more open. Be more present and talking openly to guide others' into their own healing journey. My passion and purpose lie in educating you during your healing journey.

It’s important as a community that mental health is taken more seriously.

One in five women struggle with some sort of mental health condition. The most common being depression and anxiety. Know that having a mental health condition does not make you inadequate in any way. Trauma is an added layer to any mental health condition and can also inflate symptoms similar to ADHD, Autism, and many other neurodivergent conditions. Which in turn makes it difficult for people to discern what is happening in order to seek treatment. Oftentimes getting the wrong treatment for long periods, spending time and resources. This can be flat out exhausting. In any combination, all this adds up, makes us completely insecure, feeling like we are always struggling, and not fully grasping life.

Mental health and trauma as a teenager structured a negative perception of the world. That led to bouts of depression and in my early 20’s I chose to find another way to live. How can I be better? I wanted to be better and I was willing to do whatever it took to get there. Get to the other side of healing. It was challenging in every aspect of self and being. That meant being open and vulnerable, asking others for help and knowing that there was work that I needed to do, but that I was able to have support.

So it’s important for us to understand what is going on, being willing to act on a healthy strategy and implementing strategies consciously. It's definitely easier said than done because that comes from a very conscious and some people say logical perspective. When in reality being human is an emotional being with thoughts, not a thoughtful being with feelings. So start by understanding that the human experience in this life is to experience the full range and spectrum of emotions. The trick here is not to be attached to the feeling. It’s ok to accept feelings as just parts of the human experience. We drive ourselves into a struggle with the notion that we SHOULD not feel that way. Or letting the emotions drive those thoughts into our daily lives, building around those emotions a prescription of ourselves and the world. It drives you deeper into a spiral. That’s the simplified version but all in all, it is an accumulation of experiences throughout the timeline, events that we see as defining us, trauma, everything brings you to who you are now. The battles you fight within yourself because of all that piled up.

Unlearning and challenging your growth will come with a cost, your time, energy, trust in yourself, and giving up attachments.

There’s different levels to healing: mental, emotional, body, and spiritual. Each has its own treatment plan and all will bring up other layers you may not be aware of at the time. But healing all through the process is the goal. You can choose not to work all the way through, but you will only get so far.

There is an analogy I heard by Loch Kelly. We go about life and through experiences we pick up thorns that get stuck on us. As we go, we can either, A) Build a life around NOT touching the thorns. Teaching others on how not to touch the thorn. Because the pain is too much and we do not want anyone to touch it. Or B) We can start the process of painfully removing the thorn. It takes time and is not pleasant, but once the thorn is removed, we are able to move about life more freely. Without fear of the pain the thorn causes and not having to void or stay in limits to avoid the thorn being touched.

That is where you choose. The journey is not pleasant, but through the process you gain freedom of the thoughts, experiences, and feelings that we carry as weight we use to define ourselves. But what we forget is, all of those thoughts, experiences, and feelings are not US. They are not WHO we are. It goes with the wind and is gone when the moment passes. We rewind the thoughts, experiences, and feelings again and again. A loop of suffering that we relate to our everyday lives. The thorns.

You will consistently be challenged on this journey to healing your trauma, treating your mental health, all while working with other health or life challenges. It will not be easy, but it can be done. Honestly, it has to be done. We have the right to unburden ourselves. To evolve. Heal, connect, and support each other.

Whatever your challenge is, you have a right to be here. You are valid, you are heard, you are believed, and wish you well on your journey.

By talking about it. Being a resource, a hand, a shoulder, a guide for you to start or continue your healing journey. This is not the end, but this could be the start of something amazing.